For those of you who are married / in a relationship ...
1 - 20 of 30 Posts
Joined
·
1,485 Posts
Thankfully we're both rather frugal. Not to say that recently there haven't been a few discussions about shoe purchases (her) and an expensive gas BBQ (me).
Generally though, we REALLY have a hard time parting with our hard earned cash. Although there are some large projects looming in our future that will require us to let loose the purse strings... we might need therapy.
Generally though, we REALLY have a hard time parting with our hard earned cash. Although there are some large projects looming in our future that will require us to let loose the purse strings... we might need therapy.
We're both pretty frugal, although I'm less frugal than she is. Her income is a lot smaller than mine, and when we met she balked at things like going out to supper or going to see a movie. She couldn't even afford a toaster; she was grilling her bread over the stove. I've gradually convinced her to let me take her out and treat her occasionally, but even so we only go out to eat once or twice a month, and go out to the movies at most once a year. She insists on keeping our finances separate and wants to pay her own way, which sometimes frustrates me as there are things I could afford to do that she can't. But I respect her decision and she in turn understands that sometimes I want to live a bit larger; she doesn't try to stop me.
Joined
·
1,464 Posts
For us, i'm definitely the saver in the relationship, but I guess anyone would look like a spender next to me. I guess it's all relative?
I guess it's all relative?
Joined
·
150 Posts
I would be the saver although I am in no way frugal in the classic sense. Funny how that works as when we met it was my wife who actually had savings and not me
Joined
·
465 Posts
My husband and I are a little of both. I learned early on that his idea of saving/budgeting is to take the grocery money and buy penny stocks. So I have always controlled the household money with an iron fist, especially when we had children at home. I made sure $$ flowed into the RSPs over which he had no control. On the other hand, I have no hesitation in replacing appliances with new ones rather than used. Now that we are older and a little more flush, he has his penny stock account and I have the savings.
About needing therapy.... After saving up for years and planning renovations, we have actually been fixing up around the house. It's hard to let go of the $$ even when you have earmarked them for specific purposes.
About needing therapy.... After saving up for years and planning renovations, we have actually been fixing up around the house. It's hard to let go of the $$ even when you have earmarked them for specific purposes.
This rings true for us (well me anyway). Looking at the household cash flow like a business, it makes perfect sense to spend the money on things you have been wanting to spend it on. You invest in life much as a business would invest in itself (or pay it out in a dividend). I don't generally want to own a business that just sits on cash with no plan for it. I should have the same thoughts when it comes to my life...there is money saved/invested for retirement, and then there is money available for now, or saved for purchases of big-ticket items. However, when it comes time to buy those big ticket items, it is not so easy. I get used to the larger number in the account and the security it seems to bring. Life is about balance.....but that is a much easier statment to say than it is to actually put into action.
We are both savers, which tends to be a pretty smooth ride.
I was not particularly a saver before I met her, but neither did I have any real cash flow. I never bought "stuff" in any event. In school, I would blast through $40-50 a night at the bars, 5 times a week, but who doesn't I suppose? Difficult to say whether I would have turned out as much a saver as I am today without her influence.
She's always been a saver, from age 6 or so. I remember a story she told me about having $97.32 or so in the bank account, and then getting together exactly $2.68 and depositing so that she could see the big $100 displayed in her chequebook.
I was not particularly a saver before I met her, but neither did I have any real cash flow. I never bought "stuff" in any event. In school, I would blast through $40-50 a night at the bars, 5 times a week, but who doesn't I suppose? Difficult to say whether I would have turned out as much a saver as I am today without her influence.
She's always been a saver, from age 6 or so. I remember a story she told me about having $97.32 or so in the bank account, and then getting together exactly $2.68 and depositing so that she could see the big $100 displayed in her chequebook.
My wife was always the saver, from a young age, and I was the one in loads of debt when we got married. I moved out at 17, with no high school diploma, working at MCDonald's, and no concept of money at all.
Over the years since, I've become our finance expert, managing all the money, and keeping our spending in check. My wife has zero interest in managing money, finding deals, cutting costs, etc, but she is happy that I do, and is happy to go along with whatever.
So we're lucky to be very in sync with our spending and savings habits, we never argue about money.
I see other couples, family and friends, who have large differences in their approaches to finances, and it causes them endless problems. One spender and one saver is a bad combo for a relationship.
Over the years since, I've become our finance expert, managing all the money, and keeping our spending in check. My wife has zero interest in managing money, finding deals, cutting costs, etc, but she is happy that I do, and is happy to go along with whatever.
So we're lucky to be very in sync with our spending and savings habits, we never argue about money.
I see other couples, family and friends, who have large differences in their approaches to finances, and it causes them endless problems. One spender and one saver is a bad combo for a relationship.
We're both savers.
He tends to be the risk-taker, while I like to plot a slow and steady course. He did way better than I did in our investments...until recently ;-).
We're both careful spenders - we tend to buy things rarely, but when we do, we buy quality items so they tend to be expensive.
He tends to be the risk-taker, while I like to plot a slow and steady course. He did way better than I did in our investments...until recently ;-).
We're both careful spenders - we tend to buy things rarely, but when we do, we buy quality items so they tend to be expensive.
Joined
·
80 Posts
we both WANT to be frugal, but we can each lead each other down paths...."I just bought a bunch of new shoes, you should go get that guitar you want" or "I think I'm going to have another drink...you"? BAD influence on each other.
Joined
·
13 Posts
My wife and I are both pretty frugal, although it was interesting coming to that realization.
She's definitely the penny pincher (she shops at three different grocery stores to get the cheapest items amongst the three), and she somehow thought I wasn't as good of a saver early in our relationship because it wasn't as outwardly apparent. Only until she realized I never truly bought anything for recreation did she realize I was a decent saver.
Similar story regarding misconceived notions about the other's spending habits: a friend of mine's wife chastised him for his video gaming habit; only to discover that she spent more on her knitting habit than he did on his gaming! Good stuff these relationships.
She's definitely the penny pincher (she shops at three different grocery stores to get the cheapest items amongst the three), and she somehow thought I wasn't as good of a saver early in our relationship because it wasn't as outwardly apparent. Only until she realized I never truly bought anything for recreation did she realize I was a decent saver.
Similar story regarding misconceived notions about the other's spending habits: a friend of mine's wife chastised him for his video gaming habit; only to discover that she spent more on her knitting habit than he did on his gaming! Good stuff these relationships.
Joined
·
7 Posts
We are both generally good, I am a saver more than my partner but we both have the downfall that if we do want to spend money we usually end up spending a lot of money.
Joined
·
2,054 Posts
My better half and I make a good team. He is great at research and finding sales and deals. He cannot be trusted in the computer store though. He does all the coupon clipping and grocery shopping
I do all the craigslist shopping, returning of items and investing. I take a lot more risks in investing than he is comfortable with so he is in charge of our son's RESP but the retirement account is mine.
It is important to note that even if we differ sometimes our direction is the same. We both love financial stability.
I do all the craigslist shopping, returning of items and investing. I take a lot more risks in investing than he is comfortable with so he is in charge of our son's RESP but the retirement account is mine.
It is important to note that even if we differ sometimes our direction is the same. We both love financial stability.
1 - 20 of 30 Posts
