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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
CBC Newsworld is quoting government sources saying that (before the pandemic) someone in Canada dies roughly every 6 days due to domestic violence and consequences of abuse. The anchor said during the lockdown, incidents of domestic violence are up 20% to 30%

I have a friend who works in child protection. She tells me that she sees high rates of child abuse and child sexual abuse with home-schooled children. I think it's a safe assumption that more children are being abused during the lockdown when trapped at home with abusive parents/adults. Some children are in danger at home, and are much safer at school.

On top of this we have new information out of the largest mass shooting in Canadian history in NS. The shooting rampage which took 22 lives began with a heated argument between a violent man and his girlfriend. He first beat her up, then she fled. He started looking for her in a fury, to kill her, and failing to do so went on a rampage killing everyone else in sight.

The mass shooting started as domestic violence.

As we continue the lockdown, I think we have to consider some of the very serious consequences (and new deaths) that will result from locking people into houses together. Many people do NOT get along. Today, more children are being sexually abused, women are being beaten, and people are developing suicidal thoughts.
 

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I know, it's horrible. I've been posting links tot his type of data for weeks.

We really need a plan, and we can't wait years, or even months for a vaccine that might never come.
This lockdown is hurting and killing people.
 

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Discussion Starter #3 (Edited)
I know, it's horrible. I've been posting links tot his type of data for weeks.

We really need a plan, and we can't wait years, or even months for a vaccine that might never come.
This lockdown is hurting and killing people.
Yes MrMatt I remember that you were very vocal about this from the start. There certainly are people dying, or at least suffering severe emotional turmoil, during the lockdown. These problems of today, including children being abused, is going to translate to deaths and horrible quality of life MANY years down the road.

When planning the lockdown we can't just optimize for "deaths from COVID-19 in 2020". Rather, the correct metric is total quality of life for all Canadians over the next 20 to 30 years. If a woman or child is being horribly abused daily in the lockdown, their quality of life is plummeting by the day.

And I didn't even mention the alcohol abuse that's happening. Some people are developing or extending their alcoholism during this. I've had two friends text me about waking up "hung over"... these are professionals who I think are developing drinking problems.

In fact I'm getting the sense that many of my friends are currently just sitting at home drinking. If they can't shake that habit later, this will also reduce their lifespan.

Jobs, schools, and university are more than just economic needs. For many people they are also safe places to go. Perhaps more importantly, they give structure to peoples lives. Some people will just stay at home and drink alcohol all day.
 

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This is very worrisome. My spouse and I argue (not much differently than before) but with the kids at home, it's stresses them out. Our arguments are more out of frustration, and blow over very quickly, and even here I don't like it. We have it very good as both of us are still working, we have lots of space, and are primarily 'getting on each others nerves'.

It broke my heart to hear my child's classmate was texting in hiding. Her drunk father arrive on their property and wouldn't leave. She hid saying she was doing school work with my kid. We confirmed that her and her mother are safe, which she replied 'This time we are because grandpa is awake' We sent the number for the police and the children's helpline. We don't know where this child lives as she just started texting my child when school was cancelled. We have also offered that if her mom wants to speak with me she could (never spoke or seen the mother in my life)

I have my child check in on this other little kid, but feel so helpless. This isolation is causing a lot of stress for people. For those families that were already at a breaking point, this could be it.

We don't drink very much so our habits haven't changed much. I did have to open up a bottle of wine because video wine calls seem to be the thing, I may switch to juice. However, my friend who works in the alcohol industry is saying retail sales is more than offsetting the lose in restraurants. People are buying 5-6 times more from the liquor store now. They can't be using it for parties, so that leads me to believe it's for them self.

I do think plans need to be made to help this group. Most people can get through a few weeks (as many thought that's how long they would be at home), now if it goes on for months with no end in discussion or how a phased in approach might occur, there are going to be much bigger problems.
 

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I don't think home schooling itself leads to child abuse, but I do think that most abusers choose to home school to hide the abuse from others.
 

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I don't think it's homeschooling at all. I think its because people are at stuck at home together. Families that normally are fine are even getting each others nerves a bit, so the ones that have violence or are bubbly on violence are going over the edge. Because people are stuck at home, tempers and stresses are flaring up and for those who are violent there is no place for the rest of the family members to escape.

My child's friend told her that her dad had a drinking problem before and he would just go somewhere, now he is stuck there and the rest of them need to deal with his wrath. I didn't have any details before, but I think now its people can't get away from abusers as easily.

The other problem is before quarantine, there were other people in the community that could be a check and balance for victims. Teachers, friends, coaches, collegues, etc could check in on these kids and women. That's really difficult to do when everything is at home.
 

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The isolation makes it easier to get away with.

The stress of the lockdown, financial stress etc makes any behaviour worse.
There is a lot of data that economic turmoil results in harm to people

Think about it, many marriages/relationships fight over money.
Reduce the available money and the conflict will get worse.

Getting some space, or time away can help calm an angry situation, but now you're stuck together.

If you had a job, you were barely at home, now you're at home with "nothing" to do.

If you lost your job, you may feel like you don't have a reason to get up in the morning.

Sitting at home, not working is VERY VERY bad for people. That's why I strongly oppose UBI, and why i want decision makers to be thinking of the human cost of the lockdown.
 

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Wonder what the divorce rate figures will be for 2020 ...
It should be a bit worse, but also some people might be able to build a stronger relationship.

The thing is all the bad stuff skyrockets every time there is an economic upset.
 

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Discussion Starter #10 (Edited)
Because people are stuck at home, tempers and stresses are flaring up and for those who are violent there is no place for the rest of the family members to escape.

My child's friend told her that her dad had a drinking problem before and he would just go somewhere, now he is stuck there and the rest of them need to deal with his wrath. I didn't have any details before, but I think now its people can't get away from abusers as easily.
I think that's right

I'm concerned about all the alcohol use as well. No problem with occasional drinks, I mean people who have real problems, especially if it feeds violent behaviour.
 

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Increase in unemployment also increases the suicide rate. Locking people in their homes makes the immune system weak. If someone is concerned about getting sick stay home do not take away freedom & liberty away from others.
 

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Meeting on dating apps and at social gatherings ? What does that have to do with a lock down ?
Violence and abuse is going up due to the lock down. It's not just those stuck in the same household. The lockdown is having impacts on people's mental states that they are lashing out on random dating and social gatherings.

People will lose their tempers at home more easily, however, with this continue lockdown it's going outside of the home. If it keeps up, you will have people getting violent and abusive in public settings.
 

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Police report a small increase in domestic violence calls, while reporting a sharp decline in violent crimes including sexual assault.

It appears there are more domestic violence calls, but they aren't at the level of being considered violent crimes.

Perhaps people are arguing more which could lead to a push, shove or verbal threat. In the law........they are all considered as an assault.

When they happen in a relationship they are considered "domestic" assault, although there is no specific criminal law that differentiates it.

 

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Police report a small increase in domestic violence calls, while reporting a sharp decline in violent crimes including sexual assault.

It appears there are more domestic violence calls, but they aren't at the level of being considered violent crimes.

Perhaps people are arguing more which could lead to a push, shove or verbal threat. In the law........they are all considered as an assault.

When they happen in a relationship they are considered "domestic" assault, although there is no specific criminal law that differentiates it.


Now you're suggesting domestic violence isn't a crime?
I really should have left you blocked.

Oh, I wasn't talking about saskatoon, I was talking about London area data, which is showing skyrocketting rates (35% for April, 58% for May so far) That is a terrifying trajectory.
 

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I saw an interesting thing in regards to domestic abuse on the TV news yesterday. It was a hand signal that someone being abused can give to a friend etc. on a video link (or in person I suppose). The idea being, you give this signal and can even be within hearing distance of your abuser and they won't know you are telling someone you are being abused.

I thought it looked like a good idea in general but what if your abuser has seen the ad promoting it as I have? Then they'd know to watch your hands and not just listen to what you were saying to your friend.

 

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I saw an interesting thing in regards to domestic abuse on the TV news yesterday. It was a hand signal that someone being abused can give to a friend etc. on a video link (or in person I suppose). The idea being, you give this signal and can even be within hearing distance of your abuser and they won't know you are telling someone you are being abused.

I thought it looked like a good idea in general but what if your abuser has seen the ad promoting it as I have? Then they'd know to watch your hands and not just listen to what you were saying to your friend.

I think those things are dumb.
If you need help and you're out in public enough to be seen, unless they have an illegal gun, just run away and start screaming to call the police.
If you were to do that, specify who you want to call so they don't go all bystander effect.
 

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A couple of local women's advocates go to the media and claims there is a 35% increase in calls to the center during the pandemic.

One woman's employment is closing due to a lack of funding, and both are facing a $4 million lawsuit for falsely accusing a man of domestic violence.

They went as far as going to his employer and giving media interviews falsely accusing him. They are real legal jeopardy and lawyers are expensive.

Who pays their legal bills ? The non profit organizations ? What if they shut down ?

Sometimes there is a story behind the story.
 

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Discussion Starter #20
I don't know about that. I think it's very likely domestic abuse is increasing during the lockdown.

The Nova Scotia shooting started as domestic violence as well, and it's the largest mass shooting in Canadian history.

With everyone locked indoors with each other, under stresses of various kinds, unable to work, and drinking more, it seems like the right conditions for more domestic violence.
 
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